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Beauty Currency: The Quiet Shame No One Really Talks About..
- Beth Perry
- Jul 28
- 3 min read
We often hear the phrase body acceptance, and usually, it points to weight...as if weight is the only arena where women are fighting to be free.
But for me, and for so many other women, this battle is nuanced....
It’s not just about the size of our thighs or stetch-marks we might have.
It’s about every inch of our physical being that has ever been measured, judged, or silently compared to an impossible ideal.
For me, I judged everything, but hair and my skin got the most abuse. Fine hair, soft, and never that thick, voluminous cascade the world decided was “beautiful.”From Disney films to shampoo ads, the message was pretty clear: big hair, long hair, shiny hair = Beauty.
I never had that. And a part of me still feels less than when the mirror doesnt match up to what I have seen and heard from a very young age. thick, long, shiny hair = Beauty/acceptance/worth.
And then there was my skin.
Through my teens and twenties, I struggled with acne. The kind that made me cancel plans. The kind that made me stare at myself with disgust and think: How the Fuck do I go out looking like this?! I would hide, cry, smoother my face in makeup and feel a constant rigidness in my entire body that crippled my day to day.
The emotional toll it took was brutal, and looking back I feel sad about all the time I wasted hating myself. Im in my 40's now and my skin has changed, no acne or flareups. Im sure hormones, a couple of pregnacies, and changes in my own outlook and actions have changed that. But my hair is and will always be genectically fine, my chest will always been pretty flat ...but you know what...thats okay. The sad thing is..beauty standards exsist to crush us.
To Silence us and keep us feeling unworthy.
The truth is , nobody is free, beause whether its hair, weight, wrinkles, skin issues...all of us have something to target, and industries gain from it. Multi-billion pound insdustys gain from us being insecure. So the work we must do for ourselves is pile self worth into something else...becuase the beauty myth is a trap.
Even now, in a world that pushes “natural beauty,” there are still these subtle (and not-so-subtle) messages about what “natural” should look like: glowing skin, symmetrical features, thick hair, and of course those lips.
That one snuck in too. Suddenly, thin lips meant less femininity, less desirability. Like your face has to be edited and injected to be more accepted and 'pretty'.
S0..This Is What I’m Unlearning..
This is all a big fat load of capatalistic bullshit. That beauty isn’t currency. That acceptance isn’t reserved only for those who conform to a version of the ideal. That I don’t need to “improve” because I was never broken. We were never broken.
I’m learning that body acceptance isn’t just about weight. It’s about:
Hair that doesn’t grow thick
Skin with texture, scars, or stories
Lips that don’t follow trends
Lines that come with living
Softness and sharpness that don’t fit the mould
What If Nothing Needed Changing?
What if our worth had nothing to do with appearances? What if beauty wasn’t something to chase, but something we allowed to exist ...exactly as it is?
This is what I want to hold space for, in my art, in my workshops, and in the quiet moments in between. Not just body acceptance, but whole-self acceptance!
You don’t owe the world volume, glow, or symmetry. You are not unfinished. You are not the problem. The standard is.
If you’re walking this path too, I see you. And I hope you know, you were never meant to be anything but exactly as you are.
We are all on this journey, holding onto a deep knowing that we are whole, while living in a world that’s very good at chipping away at that truth...feeding the insecurities planted in us from such a young age.
Those insecurity seeds might always be part of us in some way, but that doesn’t mean we can’t rewrite the script we tell ourselves.
My best defense is understanding that the world profits from our insecurity. Because insecurity breeds something else...it breeds fear. And fear holds us back. It halts our progress. It keeps us quiet.
It disconnects us from our power and creates a quiet, aching kind of suffering.
Ready to explore your story through art?
Join my Body Impression Workshops, book a 1:1 session or simply stay with me on this journey.
This isn’t about fixing. It’s about coming home to yourself, and my art will always beat this drum...for all women, everywhere.
P.s - If you want to explore Workshops, 1:1 sessions and Original art, Click the button below...
Beth xxx
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